Starbuck

Middle aged David Wozniak has been a screw-up all his life. He works as a delivery man (self-admittedly not a very good one) for his family's butcher business, he is $80,000 in debt which he owes to less than sympathetic crime lords, he is trying unsuccessfully to grow pot plants to pay off that debt, and his girlfriend, a police officer named Valerie, despite being pregnant with his child, wants to break up with him for not being there for her in any respect. She doesn't want him involved with the child after it's born since she believes the child is better off without him in its life. He vows to change his life around for her and the baby's sakes. Concurrently, he is informed by a lawyer representing a fertility clinic that between 1990 and 1992, when he made multiple sperm donations under the pseudonym "Starbuck" in order to earn some money (as the clinic paid $35 a donation), the clinic, in an error, used only his sperm, which has resulted in 533 children who are biologically his offspring. One hundred forty-two of them have filed a class action lawsuit demanding that his name be revealed to them. That lawyer and David's best friend, a not so adept lawyer wannabe who advises David on the matter, are the only people who know of David's unusual situation. With a file folder in hand with the names and profiles of those 142, David, as that symbolic act to prove to himself that he is indeed turning his life around, decides to be their guardian angel in an individual by individual basis without telling them who he is. As David inadvertently gets more involved in their collective lives than he was planning, he is torn between wanting to do right by his biological offspring, doing right by Valerie and yet unborn offspring number 534, and doing right by his family, all without divulging his previous identity as Starbuck, the story of which has taken on a life of its own as it hits the media.